This morning was a tough one for me. Nervous about getting all my trash and recycling out on time I forced myself to get up earlier than usual. After taking care of all that plus feeding and changing the water for the dogs and the cat and letting dogs out and in and placating an angry cat I went to check on the guinea pigs. Usually I feed them before anyone else because they squeal for their breakfast, but they were quiet this morning.
I gave them fresh food and as I was changing their water I had my usual morning conversation with Cupcake. She didn’t chatter at me or squeal to demand her morning cuddle. She was curled up in the corner looking at me. It was really kind of cute. She’s never that calm. Usually Biscuit lounges around (he’s not a morning guinea pig), but this morning he was agitated. Figuring Cupcake was just pouting (I hadn’t been paying as much attention to her lately) I reached in to pet her and pick her up. But when I touched her she was stiff. I picked her up and put her down and she stayed in that same adorable pose – curled up like a rabbit one eye looking at me. She wasn’t breathing.
I checked her body for any signs of trauma or sickness. She looked perfectly fine just as chubby as ever. But she was dead. She wasn’t the guinea pig that was supposed to die. Biscuit has been battling ear cancer since January. Cupcake was so healthy – full of life and personality. Cupcake was my favorite. The world’s most demanding and affectionate guinea pig. She was so stubborn and mischievous. She was going to live for a long time, but she didn’t and I don’t understand why.
I didn’t know what to do with her body. I couldn’t throw it out with the trash. She deserved better than that. I wanted to bury her in the backyard, but I couldn’t bear the thought of Tardis or some other creature digging her up. So I reverently placed her in a shoe box and took her to the vet. For $38 they will respectfully dispose of the body.
I could go through all the cheesy reasons the world will miss Cupcake like as a classroom guinea pig she brought shy kids out of their shells and gave all my classes a common bond (they all loved her and wrote stories about her in most stories she was an evil super villain b/c that’s just the kind of personality she had). She was a big part of my class. She would run laps around the room, get in to backpacks and scream at anyone that ate fruit and didn’t share with her.
But what most people don’t understand (I didn’t until I got Cupcake) is how much a part of your life a guinea pig can be. Cupcake was almost like a dog. She would squeal and hop when she saw or heard me. She would chatter at me or scream at me if she felt I wasn’t giving her enough attention. When I cuddled her she would make these strange R2D2 sounding noises. She would chase my cats and even bit Mati. She was curious and brave. She once tried to commit suicide by jumping out of her cage and into the jaws of a dog.
Cupcake loved out of cage time especially when I let her run around Lucy’s bathroom. Cupcake would flip over Lucy’s bowl and try to eat Lucy’s toys while Biscuit huddled in the corner.
Cupcake and I had a great relationship. That’s why her death is such a shock. Since I got back from California on Saturday I hadn’t been paying much attention to the guinea pigs. I was so worried about me. I had all this work to do. I had to clean the house. I did something stupid to my hip. Me me me. I didn’t even notice that she was dying.
We don’t know for sure what killed her. Could it have been the heat? I run the air conditioner as much as I can. If it was the heat wouldn’t Biscuit have died too? They share a cage. They had plenty of food and water. Could it have been old age? Maybe. I’ve had Cupcake for three years, but who knows how old she was when I bought her. We think most likely she got some form of kennel cough.
I think my dogs caught kennel cough from the dogs next door. Tardis made a hole in the fence just big enough for Wiggles to go through. And Wiggles sometimes goes next door to visit. The dogs all got over the cough. Only Wiggles needed medication. I didn’t think I had to worry about the guinea pigs. Cupcake developed a sneeze in May, but I didn’t do anything about it. I’m not neglectful of my pets’ health I spend a couple of hundred at the vet just about every month. Something is always wrong with someone. But with guinea pigs it’s hard. So very few places take them and it is super expensive and I’m broke. Really who takes a guinea pig in for a sneeze? It didn’t seem like much compared to Biscuit and his surgeries. Biscuit was probably protected from the cough/sneeze because he’s on antibiotics for his ear.
I don’t want to go to bed. I don’t want to go to my room and see Biscuit alone in his cage. Guinea pigs are social animals and he’s lost his cage mate. I had a plan for when Biscuit dies. I was going let Cupcake hang out with Lucy because they got along so well. Biscuit is afraid of Lucy. Biscuit is afraid of me. Actually Biscuit hates me. And he can’t even hide from me since I threw away his little tunnel/hut when I disinfected the cage (just in case Cupcake had some sort of disease). I don’t know what I’m going to do with him.
I won’t go get another guinea pig. I know it’s unfair to poor Biscuit, but I can’t do it. According to the vet Biscuit only has a few months to live (but she’s been saying that since January). I will never own guinea pigs (or anything that lives primarily in a cage) again. They are so dependent on you. They love you so much and unlike a dog they can’t go tear up your couch or eat your purse to let you know they need attention. I will not go through this again.
Maybe I am crazy for crying so much over “just a guinea pig.” But I loved her and I let her down. Now she’s gone and it hurts a lot.
- Cupcake Goldbach ? 2006- July 30, 2009
